Wednesday, March 29, 2006
I met Black yesternight. My self-proclaimed fake long-lost half-cousin. (Don't bother asking how the term came about. He never gave me a sane and rational answer when i did.) So surprise, surprise, Mr. Rizal a.k.a Black has changed. A subtle change no doubt, but still prominent enough for me to notice it. Funny how I realised it when the rest of him stays the same. How he could still miraculously showed instant gratification in the most narcissistic way possible. How his "Ahh...dah start ah tu iD, pikir bukan2.." still remind me so much of my darling Yanto. How his untamed hair still has that touch of rebellious blond courtesy of dear 'ol me. And how he never ceased to make Fahrul go crazy. Despite all that, I still see it - how he has amazingly grown up.
=))
And talking about growing up...how many times have you been asked 'WHAT DO YOU WANNA BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?' and just feel like stabbing the person asking it with the nearest sharp object? For me, the oft-asked question should only be posed to children. I mean, imagine the bemusement and smile that the little four year-old could put on your face when he confidently says, no actually,
yells, that he wanna be Batman. Haha...go figure.
So if you asked me, i'd say this....i wanna be a writer cum journalist. Though writing is not lucrative for a career here in Singapore, i would never stop at anything. I wanna write, and i wanna share my thoughts....and even if professionally, i couldn't do it, i'd still continue for i have one very avid fan of my writing works - MYSELF. =D
Just a while ago, as I was practising a little image editing of my pic and Yanto, I began thinking of all this. Imagine that from the day you are born until the day you die, you start out with a clean piece of pristine white paper. You begin life with a clean slate, no experiences. No memories. As you grow older, you start adding things to that said piece of paper, filling it with words, and such, excited at what the world holds for you. But, of course, as with everyone, you find that as you age, you want to find an eraser, to rewrite what you wrote in the past, as aspirations change, and experiences shape you. You find that what you wanted in the past is not what you want now. Reality is a teacher of sorts who remind you that certain things you dream of doing are just unfeasible, intangible, and you decide to replace it with something else that match up to the expectations of a forementioned teacher.
That's what i wanna do. What i ever wanna be...
And before i bore you off your pants with my endless ramblings of my inseparable partner, WORDS, i better end it off here. Anyway, as I said before, there will come a time when i have a niggling feeling that what i wrote before is going to be erased anyway, so i don't write with as much fervor and intensity as before.
Sadd ehh?
But still, i wun stop. I'm stubborn..soo...? Bite me. RAWR.
10:32 AM
